Punters Guide to Escorting

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This essay contains the advice or opinions of one or more UKPunting members. This is advice from Punters to Escorts. No one is saying you can do all of this. But it IS what many punters say they want!

Are you new to Escorting? Or perhaps you are not new but want the punters view on how to be a great escort.

Other Escorts and SAAFE give you advice on how to be an escort. But what do punters say?

Topics

How to take Bookings

  • Make a big effort to reply promptly to all posts/texts. Do reply to all posts eventually (even if you can't be prompt).
  • Share your post code as soon as the booking is made. We understand security and think it best not to give house number/flat number until he is outside.
  • Don't press Confirmed on AdultWork until the meeting happens. Just press Scheduled.
  • Share your 'how to confirm' rule. Most punter expect to confirm on the day. State this on your profile and in booking confirmation note.
  • Always leave 15 minutes (or more!) between bookings. Do have a quick shower in this time. Always be ready on time. Text 'I am ready' promptly at booking time.
  • Don't blame the previous punter for time delays. We don't care about him. If he arrives late, he still leaves on time.
  • Be polite and warm if a phone booking is made. We know you have to deal with "telephone wankers", but you may lose a booking if you appear curt and aggressive.
  • If you do cancel, don't make up a lie. And if it is last minute, we suggest a discount off next booking.
  • Don't throw a strop if a punter calls you on your day off. Simple solution: have a dedicated phone for taking bookings and turn it off when you are not working.

Tips other than sex services

  • Welcome the punter with a warm kiss and a cuddle.
  • Offer him a drink (including beer and wine). Have a glass of wine with him - this is very sociable.
  • Offer him a shower. Offer to join him in the shower. Just keep your hair and make up out of the water.
  • Wear no lipstick that might get on him. Wear no strong perfume.
  • Be ready to play music. Not commercial radio nor MTV - an advert during sex is poor. Really, get an Amazon Echo ('Alexa') or a docking station for your phone. Silence is poor. Normal TV is poor. Adverts are poor. If you play spotify, get the ad free version. (Of course some guys wont want music - but many do).
  • Don't ever check your phone for new text messages or take a phone call during any part of the booking. Don't even ask him if it is OK - he might say 'yes', but he won't really like it. Just don't.
  • Don't "slag off" the competition by talking about any escorts you dislike. It will not display high status; it is off-putting and a mood killer. (It is OK to talk about sex and sex work...it is one thing you really do have in common - just be positive!)
  • Pricing. Price it so each 30 min costs less or the same as the 30 min before. (Don't arrive at the 1.5 hour price by adding 30 min price to the 60 min price). The outcall versus incall difference does not grow. Outcall is always, say, £20 more than an incall.
  • Pricing. The girls who charge £30 less than you are not seeing low class guys. (According to MN, we are all low class.) Those girls are just busier, and loving it. Maybe lower your price? Try it for a few weeks.
  • Bonus points: Check him for lipstick/hairs/shirt tucked in before he leaves.

And do we really need to mention?

  • Have lots of condoms of different sizes ready.
  • Make sure the incall location is as clean and tidy as a hotel. This includes the bathroom. Hotels don't have girl stuff over every square inch of space.
  • Seeing multiple guys in a hotel?: Make sure the hotel is as clean as the moment you arrived. With a clean towel for him (get one per punter somehow).
  • Don't rush the guy, and don't stop early. Five minutes left is enough time for more sex. (Meaning don't stop early - good punters don't expect bonus time).
  • Wear sexy or elegant clothing. Do not answer the door wearing a tracksuit with no make-up on; men won't find it cute, they may think you are lazy and may walk (unless requested, clearly!). Needless to say this applies to underwear as well, wear sexy matching sets - stockings and suspenders are also nice; avoid wearing bloomers, big pants, men's pants, ripped tights and tacky peephole bras - unless requested!
  • Pets under control.
  • Do not extend a booking if you have another booking. Of course be kind to the man with you. But you have already agreed to meet the next man. Just say 'no'. We understand. We are allowed to ask for an extension, you are allowed to say 'no'.

Tips about sex services

  • Offer everything on your profile. Always.
  • One price. No extras.
  • Don't bother saying 'at discretion'. We know if we are smelly pigs you will say 'no'. Don't mention this on your profile ... not sexy.
  • Avoid listing that you do not see Black and Asian guys. Most guys hate it when you say this. We fuck all sorts of girls, why do you exclude our black brothers?.
  • You don't want to Kiss? Really!? is this the right job for you? Just do it, or move on.
  • Be consistent with your service. Do you only offer kissing to the men you fancy? Do you only offer anal when you feel like it? This could result in disappointment for some punters and may result in negative or neutral reviews when they compare experiences.
  • Don't ask if we want to start with a massage. This starts the meet off with a gentle negative. We came for fore play leading to sex. (Of course if we ask for a massage as part of booking that is different)
  • Enjoy yourself. Rub your clit. Use your toy. We don't mind. It is a turn on.

Tips about your profile

  • Be brave. Read the whole thread on Pet Hates.
  • Short summary: (1) Less is more. (2) No pixel pics. (3) Don't say things like 'no time wasters' - aim all comments at real punters. (4) A quick guide on the best way to book you is welcome - escorts have different ways. (5) Don't say 'read my profile before calling'. If guys are not going to read it, then they don't see that anyway. (6) Don't say 'my pictures are real' nor 'I look better in person'. ( MRDA )(7) A clear schedule of your next two weeks is unusual, but very welcome.
  • Don't write a blog that is excessively negative towards punters or other escorts. It is helpful to share information about dangerous punters, scams or rip-off photographers, but would a man want to see an escort who writes essays about "cheesy bellends and smelly arses"? Would you date a man who complains about BV on a match site?
  • Do not advertise services you have no intention of carrying out, such as kissing, OWO and watersports. The punter will feel conned, if he saw you for that service.
  • Common grammar and spelling mistakes seen on profiles: "Hello Gays", "Very intelligant lady", "big tots", "discrete service". A note about text speak: would a sophisticated escort use "call me 4 a gud fuk" on their profile?
  • List the days and times you are working each week. If you are on holiday list that. It shouldn't be a guessing game.

Threads about how to be an Escort on UKP

See Also


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